supposed to get the test results today, but the website doesn't seemed to be working. no emails too. so, jus have to wait for the results in my letter-box. whatever the result be, it doesn't matter anymore. pass or fail.. i still have to sit for similar but slightly tougher paper next month.
i really want this .. i do not want to waste much time... age is catching up..
thankful to have one good friend who is doing this with me...
glad to have met her.. never knew that we'd be best friends... (i think we are best friends now, are we?)
and knowing kev is and has always been by my side, loving me and caring for me.. given me all the attention i always wanted.. all the time..all these while..
i really want to make him happy .. very happy +++ ...
i have to make this happen.. just for us.
got to build back what i have destroyed..
the love, the happiness, the sunshine, the joy, the laughters...
God, pls help me achieve this.
i must say that i am still very sad, i regret,
there wouldn't be a second chance.. but u given me
.. the tears have not run dry.. and will never run dry for me..
it will never end..
and if i can't make things as good as before
as fun as before
as beautiful as before
.. then i see the end of me..
Friday, January 25, 2008
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Island Getaway: Part 1
Drove up to Changi Village one sunday morning with none other than my one and only girlfriend, who loves the sun, the sea and the sand, Yf.
The day before that, we sat for the "test" , but only to find out, sadly that we had registered and therefore sat for the wrong paper! It was the most expensive mistake we made. How can we be so careless?!!! How to "make it" like this?? There was nothing we can do now, but only to pay $$$ again for the next correct test, and of course, enjoy the rest of our off days which we had planned for.
After the written test, we joined kev at sento.
then, the following day, went to changi village. actually, we wanted to go to Pulau Ubin but decide to wait for kev, to go with.
then, the following that day, after we sat for our oral/speech test, we went to sento again. Reached sento and it rained so heavily. Again nothing much we can do about it, so we played under the rain. We ignored the Red Flag, and got whistled away by the lifeguards, to stay out of the water.
And the next morning , Kev's day off and the 3 of us went for a short island getaway.. to Pulau Ubin, of course. Part 2 for pictures taken from Yf's digicam. We were not able to cover the whole island on that day, cos yf had to work nite that day. So, part 3 .. anytime soon.
So basically, nothing much was done over that weekend but just fun! fun! fun! And I love it!!! Well... except for having that thought of paying $$$ to re-do the test!
The day before that, we sat for the "test" , but only to find out, sadly that we had registered and therefore sat for the wrong paper! It was the most expensive mistake we made. How can we be so careless?!!! How to "make it" like this?? There was nothing we can do now, but only to pay $$$ again for the next correct test, and of course, enjoy the rest of our off days which we had planned for.
After the written test, we joined kev at sento.
then, the following day, went to changi village. actually, we wanted to go to Pulau Ubin but decide to wait for kev, to go with.
then, the following that day, after we sat for our oral/speech test, we went to sento again. Reached sento and it rained so heavily. Again nothing much we can do about it, so we played under the rain. We ignored the Red Flag, and got whistled away by the lifeguards, to stay out of the water.
And the next morning , Kev's day off and the 3 of us went for a short island getaway.. to Pulau Ubin, of course. Part 2 for pictures taken from Yf's digicam. We were not able to cover the whole island on that day, cos yf had to work nite that day. So, part 3 .. anytime soon.
So basically, nothing much was done over that weekend but just fun! fun! fun! And I love it!!! Well... except for having that thought of paying $$$ to re-do the test!
Sunrise at Desaru
The morning was cool and breezy, with the high waves crashing to its golden sandy beach. We were at the beach as early as 0630hrs.. took some photos by the beach while waiting for the sun to come out. The sun, eventually made its appearance from behind the clouds and gave that beautiful picture- perfect sun rays instead. Awesome.Think we were the only guests at that resort. We had the beach all to ourselves.
After preparing the food stuff for the evening bbq, we quickly got changed and eager to hit the beach. Before crossing over a small wooden bridge, stood a red flag with a signboard stating that the beach is closed as it is not safe for swimming. But we chose to ignore it.
We held hands and ran straight towards the sea, and were ready to be swept away by the strong and high waves back to the shore.. Had great fun playing with great company of friends who loves the sun, the sea, and nature.
With the help of GPS, think we can safely visit Desaru again in the near future. And maybe, the next time, Kev will allow me to drive on Malaysia road.
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
nOise in my tummy..
blogging while my junoir sent one of my patient for an MRI brain/MRA, and while the other 2 either playing games or glued to you tube. not everytime i get to relax and do this.. most of the time, i would struggle with IVs around this time.. but not tonight. Tonight i can breathe eventhough, there's 4 new cases to attend to, still waiting for the 1 to be admitted.
Can't open my eyes .. so dead tired today. The 2 episodes of vomiting earlier this afternoon, is making me feel so weak and drowsy. Looking pale when stepped into the ward, noticed by some here. And if only i have not answered that phone call, maybe i would not be kept awake and having this abdominal discomfort and vomitted. Arrgh,.. i can hear my tummy juices churning...
Lots of food in the ward.. ordered pizza.. and a colleague brought some donuts, but just couldn't make myself enjoy eating it. Oh... there goes the sound in my tummy again! Am I hungry or what? But i am afraid to eat, afraid that i might jus throw up again.
Since the ward's a little less hectic, i think i better take a short nap. Been standing, in this utility room using the phlebo's laptop updating my long time never updated blog. Better get out before i faint in here..
Actually, my colleague, Shikin asking.. on my updates ,the previous night. Well girl, here it is.
Well actually, there's so much going on in my life.. all the past events, good and bad, happy and sad.. memories of it all, etched in my head.. everyday when i am alone, on a bus or mrt journey to/from work/home, for instance, i think about my life, my wrong doings, my ugly behaviour, what more can i do to improve on myself, thinking of some of the things i should focus on, people i love and must care for, ...and so on, which have it all reflected and probably blogged in my head instead :)
Can't open my eyes .. so dead tired today. The 2 episodes of vomiting earlier this afternoon, is making me feel so weak and drowsy. Looking pale when stepped into the ward, noticed by some here. And if only i have not answered that phone call, maybe i would not be kept awake and having this abdominal discomfort and vomitted. Arrgh,.. i can hear my tummy juices churning...
Lots of food in the ward.. ordered pizza.. and a colleague brought some donuts, but just couldn't make myself enjoy eating it. Oh... there goes the sound in my tummy again! Am I hungry or what? But i am afraid to eat, afraid that i might jus throw up again.
Since the ward's a little less hectic, i think i better take a short nap. Been standing, in this utility room using the phlebo's laptop updating my long time never updated blog. Better get out before i faint in here..
Actually, my colleague, Shikin asking.. on my updates ,the previous night. Well girl, here it is.
Well actually, there's so much going on in my life.. all the past events, good and bad, happy and sad.. memories of it all, etched in my head.. everyday when i am alone, on a bus or mrt journey to/from work/home, for instance, i think about my life, my wrong doings, my ugly behaviour, what more can i do to improve on myself, thinking of some of the things i should focus on, people i love and must care for, ...and so on, which have it all reflected and probably blogged in my head instead :)
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
Together we finish this..
All i wanted from this year's marathon was to finish the run with Kevin and have our photo taken side-by-side, towards the finishing line.
Of course, we did worst than last year!
No preparation what-so-ever , just whack. Oh.. the only prep we did was, that we went for a neck-shoulder massage and foot reflexology on the night before the run.
Kevin was down with flu for the past few days and still not well till today. It's the weather, these days.
Very bad of me .. made him run the full marathon.
As for me, I was recovering from lower back strain. Was on medical leave for 7 days prior to the marathon day. My back does not cause much pain at all while running or walking. It hurts only when trying to sit and getting up from a sitting or lying position. So i don't really care much about my back pain while running.
We were running at a very comfortable pace, until we reached 21km mark, Kev started to have his cramps. And that was it. At 30km, my turn to have aches and cramps. We jogged, walked, stopped for stretching.. applied muscle rubs, took pain killers..
... oh yes.. we were very hungry too. ..
The cramps kept coming very 2 to 3 minutes, so we decided to power walk the rest of the 10km or so, till we reached the end.. finally..
Satisfied that I get to have this photo taken in this year's run. We may not be doing this together next year, so this could be ours, one and only.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Shhhh.. Do not disturb!!
That's what's written on the back of our jacket which we need to put on during medication rounds, expecting no one to disturb us while dispensing medicines to prevent errors. But does it work?
Patients, patient's relatives and doctors still walk up or call us from faraway .. disrupting our medication rounds. Worst still if it's our very own nursing officers or clinicians. They are the ones who wants us to put on the jackets , and yet, they are the ones who would come interrupt with our work flow.
Maybe they can't see that we are wearing the jacket. Well it used to be lighter blue, close to our blue scrub.. that could be the reason that the jacket is now changed to dark maroon, so that people can notice it better..
but what's the use if these people kept coming to us. So who needs to change? the people around us or the jacket?
there's actually no need for any jacket to be worn since no one reads the message behind my back.. and most of the time, we are facing the patients , so how can we expect them to know what's written behind my back. Well of cos, they will be able to read it once i turn around.. but then we won't have the same patient everyday. Somemore, most of the patients cannot read English!! No matter how big the sign is, it won't help!
I don't blame my patients or their relatives. they are not part of the system. whenever they come to us during medication rounds, we would not turn them down. and at the same time, we will explain about the use of the jacket on us.
but to those who are in the system, who created this system for donkey years.. They have no excuse..
Anyway, still i feel there's no need to put on the jacket, since we can't stop these people from coming to us. Super blind they must be.. isn't the medicine trolley big enough to indicate that we are serving medicine?!
Patients, patient's relatives and doctors still walk up or call us from faraway .. disrupting our medication rounds. Worst still if it's our very own nursing officers or clinicians. They are the ones who wants us to put on the jackets , and yet, they are the ones who would come interrupt with our work flow.
Maybe they can't see that we are wearing the jacket. Well it used to be lighter blue, close to our blue scrub.. that could be the reason that the jacket is now changed to dark maroon, so that people can notice it better..
but what's the use if these people kept coming to us. So who needs to change? the people around us or the jacket?
there's actually no need for any jacket to be worn since no one reads the message behind my back.. and most of the time, we are facing the patients , so how can we expect them to know what's written behind my back. Well of cos, they will be able to read it once i turn around.. but then we won't have the same patient everyday. Somemore, most of the patients cannot read English!! No matter how big the sign is, it won't help!
I don't blame my patients or their relatives. they are not part of the system. whenever they come to us during medication rounds, we would not turn them down. and at the same time, we will explain about the use of the jacket on us.
but to those who are in the system, who created this system for donkey years.. They have no excuse..
Anyway, still i feel there's no need to put on the jacket, since we can't stop these people from coming to us. Super blind they must be.. isn't the medicine trolley big enough to indicate that we are serving medicine?!
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Magic leave
Already applied leave on this day, 02 Dec, still pending for approval, but if not granted.. no choice la... have to take "magic" leave.
Sometimes, in some cases.. the leave not granted.. report for work.. then, u find out that one of ur colleague called up during ur shift to report sick!!!
That happened to me once before.. and i hate it... heart pain!
almost 1 yr in this service, and i still hate this place. me and yf been saying it, showing it but still we are here, while half of whom we know have already left !!! Felt stupid actually.. talked and showed so much anger and frustration but still we're surviving..!! Well, it's ok la.. it's not that we hate nursing .. we love our job. I think, the more me and yf talked abt our love hate relationship with our work and stuff.. it has actually kept us going.. until the day we actually leave for good.. only God knows when..
Sometimes, in some cases.. the leave not granted.. report for work.. then, u find out that one of ur colleague called up during ur shift to report sick!!!
That happened to me once before.. and i hate it... heart pain!
almost 1 yr in this service, and i still hate this place. me and yf been saying it, showing it but still we are here, while half of whom we know have already left !!! Felt stupid actually.. talked and showed so much anger and frustration but still we're surviving..!! Well, it's ok la.. it's not that we hate nursing .. we love our job. I think, the more me and yf talked abt our love hate relationship with our work and stuff.. it has actually kept us going.. until the day we actually leave for good.. only God knows when..
Why are our polar bears green in colour?
oh.. i enjoy driving now.. been driving to work for the past week or so, fun..
i am loving it. But then, i have to learn to relax while driving with kev next to me.
Drove to the zoo yesterday.. wasn't sure if it's per entry charge or not ..
it only states something like this on the gantry.. " FRee Parking? Join the Zoo Friend ... "
but u know, the park so big.. surely take time to walk.. anyway.. it's a once a lifetime visit.., so it's ok. Cannot be too calculative hor..already got free admission .. so I paid $3.90 for parking.. get to see the white tiger, polar bear, lion, giraffe, pig!.. except the sun bear! every time, cannot find the sun bear... and the map size getting smaller.. don;t have to open map big big..
i am loving it. But then, i have to learn to relax while driving with kev next to me.
Drove to the zoo yesterday.. wasn't sure if it's per entry charge or not ..
it only states something like this on the gantry.. " FRee Parking? Join the Zoo Friend ... "
but u know, the park so big.. surely take time to walk.. anyway.. it's a once a lifetime visit.., so it's ok. Cannot be too calculative hor..already got free admission .. so I paid $3.90 for parking.. get to see the white tiger, polar bear, lion, giraffe, pig!.. except the sun bear! every time, cannot find the sun bear... and the map size getting smaller.. don;t have to open map big big..
Thursday, November 01, 2007
like yesterday.. but better..
no matter how busy.. we still get to do what was already been planned.
Ran for that 15km New Balance Real Run last weekend, after 2 nights of super back2back heavy metal concert.. Megadeth and Black Sabbath .. at Fort Canning Park,was great. Bigger turnout for the latter. Bought their latest CDs .. and Megadeth T-shirt.
did not train for the run.. in fact i never been serious.. jus whack. though i went for the trial run on 14th Oct, i did not complete the 15km, skipped the beach and trail. The thought of facing the hot sun, running that stretch of the runway.. was a real torture!
But i finally made it.. and of cos, kevin is so proud of me even though i took 2hrs.
the results and photos not out yet.. hopefully the photographers got take snaps of me! i want to see how tired i look.. must be ugly-looking!
next, will be full marathon on 3 Dec.
time to train? if i have the energy, i will..
after work, usually too tired to do anything.. except for movies and eat.
most times, i slept in the movies too..
what a waste of money!
tried a couple of times, running from work to home, but never get to reach home..
called kevin to rescue me or continue with MRT.
Ran for that 15km New Balance Real Run last weekend, after 2 nights of super back2back heavy metal concert.. Megadeth and Black Sabbath .. at Fort Canning Park,was great. Bigger turnout for the latter. Bought their latest CDs .. and Megadeth T-shirt.
did not train for the run.. in fact i never been serious.. jus whack. though i went for the trial run on 14th Oct, i did not complete the 15km, skipped the beach and trail. The thought of facing the hot sun, running that stretch of the runway.. was a real torture!
But i finally made it.. and of cos, kevin is so proud of me even though i took 2hrs.
the results and photos not out yet.. hopefully the photographers got take snaps of me! i want to see how tired i look.. must be ugly-looking!
next, will be full marathon on 3 Dec.
time to train? if i have the energy, i will..
after work, usually too tired to do anything.. except for movies and eat.
most times, i slept in the movies too..
what a waste of money!
tried a couple of times, running from work to home, but never get to reach home..
called kevin to rescue me or continue with MRT.
to leave or, to stay..
some nursing friends have already resigned. how i wish i am in their shoes.
for breaking the bond might cost me 17k to 20k, equivalent to about 10mths of pay..
been thinking .. work hard next 10mths,with higher pay to pay off the bond and then, back to normal..and seek for other opportunities.
.. or suffer for the next 26 months, handling as many as 10 to max 20 cases?
we were asked: why the high MC rate?
for "she" who have worked for over 20yrs.. doesn't she know the answer?
"tired" was the only answer we can think of.. but it was considered as just an excuse. But the 1 day rest is and can never be enough. We're encouraged to clear our annual leave.. but there's no slot for clearance.. so how? encashment? i want my break.. long break.. if possible..
i got abt 13 days to clear ... of which, can only bring forward four days over to 2008 AL. so how?
for breaking the bond might cost me 17k to 20k, equivalent to about 10mths of pay..
been thinking .. work hard next 10mths,with higher pay to pay off the bond and then, back to normal..and seek for other opportunities.
.. or suffer for the next 26 months, handling as many as 10 to max 20 cases?
we were asked: why the high MC rate?
for "she" who have worked for over 20yrs.. doesn't she know the answer?
"tired" was the only answer we can think of.. but it was considered as just an excuse. But the 1 day rest is and can never be enough. We're encouraged to clear our annual leave.. but there's no slot for clearance.. so how? encashment? i want my break.. long break.. if possible..
i got abt 13 days to clear ... of which, can only bring forward four days over to 2008 AL. so how?
Thursday, September 06, 2007
2007 Army Half Marathon
This yr's run not as stressful.. straight road, the longest route was the along East Coast park. Kevin ran with me.. till almost towards the end, we parted. After 15km, he started to feel the pain again on his knees. Ran slowly and a few times, we caught up with each other again.
Last yr kevin accompanied me up till the Fort Road and waited for me at the finish. Towards the end, i got asthma attack. rested 15 mins.. and continued running.. finished at 3:05 somewhere there.. This yr.. thank God, no attacks, but i finished at 3:01. No diff at all. But i did not walk that much..in fact kevin was bedide me motivating me tto keep on running.. not to stop. Hmm... nevermind la.. felt like wanting to give up this running altogether.. but last monday, i registered for the 15km Real Run, paid 30 bucks for that!! waliau.. it's not getting any cheaper!! hopefully the goodie pack is worth the fee.
anyway.. still have to keep on running .. as i have already registered for this yr's full marathon.
Think those are the only 2 remaining runs i'll be looking forward to.
@Work.. too much politics in the ward itself, worst than in any big organisations. Did not report to work yesterday eventhough i had my day off the day before, after been working for 7 days.. ( where got work 6 days week one!! liar..) i am tired and may just get sick. No breaks again at work .. Feeling frustrated with how things are.. with everything... and everybody... .. watever.
Went to sentosa on my off day. And went for short run yesterday.. thinking that i would feel better.. but nah.. i got sick..runny nose.. teary eyes.. sneeze non-stop.. so decided to laze at home.. reported mc for yesterday. Basically .. i need more rest, that's all i want!!! I want a 6 day work week .. not 7 or 8 day work week!!!
Last yr kevin accompanied me up till the Fort Road and waited for me at the finish. Towards the end, i got asthma attack. rested 15 mins.. and continued running.. finished at 3:05 somewhere there.. This yr.. thank God, no attacks, but i finished at 3:01. No diff at all. But i did not walk that much..in fact kevin was bedide me motivating me tto keep on running.. not to stop. Hmm... nevermind la.. felt like wanting to give up this running altogether.. but last monday, i registered for the 15km Real Run, paid 30 bucks for that!! waliau.. it's not getting any cheaper!! hopefully the goodie pack is worth the fee.
anyway.. still have to keep on running .. as i have already registered for this yr's full marathon.
Think those are the only 2 remaining runs i'll be looking forward to.
@Work.. too much politics in the ward itself, worst than in any big organisations. Did not report to work yesterday eventhough i had my day off the day before, after been working for 7 days.. ( where got work 6 days week one!! liar..) i am tired and may just get sick. No breaks again at work .. Feeling frustrated with how things are.. with everything... and everybody... .. watever.
Went to sentosa on my off day. And went for short run yesterday.. thinking that i would feel better.. but nah.. i got sick..runny nose.. teary eyes.. sneeze non-stop.. so decided to laze at home.. reported mc for yesterday. Basically .. i need more rest, that's all i want!!! I want a 6 day work week .. not 7 or 8 day work week!!!
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
suppose to go for blood test tdy after work but i totally forgotten. jus like what i wanted..once done.. game over. left the ward almost immediately.
tmr must make sure to go to the clinic to have my blood taken.
work was smooth.. but somehow.. pple still want to double check my work.. don;t believe me is it? go ahead.. question me.. double check my work .. i can wait.
tmr must make sure to go to the clinic to have my blood taken.
work was smooth.. but somehow.. pple still want to double check my work.. don;t believe me is it? go ahead.. question me.. double check my work .. i can wait.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
so tired..................
morning shift almost everyday till saturday. morning shift the toughest.
but i must make sure not to make any mistakes.. medication error, documentation and so on. don;t let anyone bully me.
work fast but must be thorough.. alert and consistent. make sure to manage my time well. make sure my juniors got to get to for their breaks.
i don't eat also never mind. i will not complaint. finish work nice nice..
pass over and go home.
peace.
morning shift almost everyday till saturday. morning shift the toughest.
but i must make sure not to make any mistakes.. medication error, documentation and so on. don;t let anyone bully me.
work fast but must be thorough.. alert and consistent. make sure to manage my time well. make sure my juniors got to get to for their breaks.
i don't eat also never mind. i will not complaint. finish work nice nice..
pass over and go home.
peace.
Monday, August 20, 2007
i do not have my mobile in my pockets while at work, so the first thing i do whenever i go for my break is to reach for my mobile to check for messages.
this morning i rec'd 2 smses, one said sorry to hear abt my pt's passing on.. and the second was "my dear,how's the tension at work ? tell me later when u're free " it almost made me cry.. quietly and quickly left the ward, for my break at the kopitiam instead of ta-pau-ing it up. spend some quiet time at the corner with my music and new paper. really need a break from the ward. not that i hate the pple i am working with today. it's just that i don't like the way they talk to me. i know that i might have done something wrong or they just don't like the way i am.. i don;t know..
we can always talk nicely.. there's no need to shout and throw things, showing temper in front of patients. at times, i felt that i was being bullied..no respect, and i felt very "small" , i felt there's generation gap among us (majority 10yrs my jr).. but it's alright. i shall stay calm and not fight back.. something which i don't do in public. and it's not my style. sometimes, keeping quiet would do some good. And so, i did just that this morning at work. Kept to myself most of time, talk when necessary ..
(they actually looked for me.. during my break. wondering where i've been... )
i did not reply to the sms till we met later in the evening, and by then, i totally forgotten all about the tension i had with the pple around me. never in past working experience, had anyone shouted at me. totally shocked.
the sms did mean a lot to me at that moment. though i do confide with my other colleagues.. but i can't show them how depressed i was. their words did hurt a little but i can't cry. i felt disappointed and angry at the same time too. told myself that i must be strong. i had to.
i felt better knowing he cares, .. and it's all because of him that i am able to be strong and face the challenges (but mostly, shit) .. emotionally and mentally. i am not alone.
Finally, i finished with that incident report, submitted and now jus have to wait for pple up there to discuss and feedback. surely kena marked liao.
then after work, decided to go break free .. went to PartyWorld at Yishun Safra, happy hours with Marichelle.
then kev came.
went to watch Bourne Ultimatum.
RAte: 4/5 ( would have been 5/5, but i slept during some exciting parts)
last friday, watched Rush Hour 3.
RAte: 4/5 (didn't sleep, funny but not so exciting, same kind of fighting.. but the jokes, best!)
But the best movie so far i've watched this mth, was FlashPoint. Rate: 5/5 ( never blink eyes .. mouth open big big.. handsome actors.. fighting, best!)
this morning i rec'd 2 smses, one said sorry to hear abt my pt's passing on.. and the second was "my dear,how's the tension at work ? tell me later when u're free " it almost made me cry.. quietly and quickly left the ward, for my break at the kopitiam instead of ta-pau-ing it up. spend some quiet time at the corner with my music and new paper. really need a break from the ward. not that i hate the pple i am working with today. it's just that i don't like the way they talk to me. i know that i might have done something wrong or they just don't like the way i am.. i don;t know..
we can always talk nicely.. there's no need to shout and throw things, showing temper in front of patients. at times, i felt that i was being bullied..no respect, and i felt very "small" , i felt there's generation gap among us (majority 10yrs my jr).. but it's alright. i shall stay calm and not fight back.. something which i don't do in public. and it's not my style. sometimes, keeping quiet would do some good. And so, i did just that this morning at work. Kept to myself most of time, talk when necessary ..
(they actually looked for me.. during my break. wondering where i've been... )
i did not reply to the sms till we met later in the evening, and by then, i totally forgotten all about the tension i had with the pple around me. never in past working experience, had anyone shouted at me. totally shocked.
the sms did mean a lot to me at that moment. though i do confide with my other colleagues.. but i can't show them how depressed i was. their words did hurt a little but i can't cry. i felt disappointed and angry at the same time too. told myself that i must be strong. i had to.
i felt better knowing he cares, .. and it's all because of him that i am able to be strong and face the challenges (but mostly, shit) .. emotionally and mentally. i am not alone.
Finally, i finished with that incident report, submitted and now jus have to wait for pple up there to discuss and feedback. surely kena marked liao.
then after work, decided to go break free .. went to PartyWorld at Yishun Safra, happy hours with Marichelle.
then kev came.
went to watch Bourne Ultimatum.
RAte: 4/5 ( would have been 5/5, but i slept during some exciting parts)
last friday, watched Rush Hour 3.
RAte: 4/5 (didn't sleep, funny but not so exciting, same kind of fighting.. but the jokes, best!)
But the best movie so far i've watched this mth, was FlashPoint. Rate: 5/5 ( never blink eyes .. mouth open big big.. handsome actors.. fighting, best!)
Saturday, August 18, 2007
the patient died..
on my last night, about 2am, my colleague came to me .. said that the patient requested to speak to his son. cos he said that he's dying.. i said ok .. let's call him up but most of my colleagues were against my decision. it was too late to call the family.. and anyway, the patient always request for the same thing almost everyday. so we all chose to ignore.
the patient, was planned to be discharged today, saturday .. either back home or hospice. i was looking forward to see him after my 2 days off, but only to find out that he had passed away.
maybe, he knew that there's no one at home waiting for him since his wife is currently lying at SGH. and he knew that he's condition couldn't take him any further.
this is the same patient, i made that medication error. the one that i had to write up the incident report, which till now.. i have yet to complete. I hope my error did not contribute to his death.
i regret not calling his son on the night he requested for it. i should have just gone with my gut feelings.. and not listen to my colleagues. :(
on my last night, about 2am, my colleague came to me .. said that the patient requested to speak to his son. cos he said that he's dying.. i said ok .. let's call him up but most of my colleagues were against my decision. it was too late to call the family.. and anyway, the patient always request for the same thing almost everyday. so we all chose to ignore.
the patient, was planned to be discharged today, saturday .. either back home or hospice. i was looking forward to see him after my 2 days off, but only to find out that he had passed away.
maybe, he knew that there's no one at home waiting for him since his wife is currently lying at SGH. and he knew that he's condition couldn't take him any further.
this is the same patient, i made that medication error. the one that i had to write up the incident report, which till now.. i have yet to complete. I hope my error did not contribute to his death.
i regret not calling his son on the night he requested for it. i should have just gone with my gut feelings.. and not listen to my colleagues. :(
Thursday, August 16, 2007
so i decided to pack my stuff.. dumped my bag in the locker and ran 2 rounds around yishun park. and now i am sleepy... kev on his way home from SIM, will be home anytime now.
Oh, i have a new neighbour. chinese. with 1 kid. a granny. a dog.
met up with the couple, eric and evan, but never the dog. the dog's sharp and loud bark simply irritates me. somehow, the owner knew and apologise. told them i got cats and apparently they knew too. but don;t think they know how many i have, hehehe..
today i finally get to see their pet doggy.. .. it appeared at their front door balcony gate..barking at me.. then someone say shhhhh!! and then shut the door.
ha!
It is smaller that a standard small sized cute sort of doggy ..
but one thing very certain.. my cats are bigger .. and also, my cats fiercer ... my cats' paws more solid. think i better get a pet insurance, just in case .. my cats attack poor doggy.
Actually, I don't mind dogs.. bigger better.. small ones very irritating..they too hyper... run here.. run there.. not direction one. bark here and there.. don;t know what they want .. noisy! i hope i will not accidently kick it ..
kevin's back.. gonna sleep early..
Oh, i have a new neighbour. chinese. with 1 kid. a granny. a dog.
met up with the couple, eric and evan, but never the dog. the dog's sharp and loud bark simply irritates me. somehow, the owner knew and apologise. told them i got cats and apparently they knew too. but don;t think they know how many i have, hehehe..
today i finally get to see their pet doggy.. .. it appeared at their front door balcony gate..barking at me.. then someone say shhhhh!! and then shut the door.
ha!
It is smaller that a standard small sized cute sort of doggy ..
but one thing very certain.. my cats are bigger .. and also, my cats fiercer ... my cats' paws more solid. think i better get a pet insurance, just in case .. my cats attack poor doggy.
Actually, I don't mind dogs.. bigger better.. small ones very irritating..they too hyper... run here.. run there.. not direction one. bark here and there.. don;t know what they want .. noisy! i hope i will not accidently kick it ..
kevin's back.. gonna sleep early..
oh... i jus realised that kevin got class tonight :(
now i really don;t know what to do.. i thot that would be seeing him like right now..
but NO!!!! he'll be back at 11.
guess.. i eat alone, don;t have to open mouth today..no one to talk to..
self talk with blogger .. sianzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
but don;t think i can stay quiet very long with my lappy.........
hmmm... let's see.. maybe now i go get towel.. take a stroll through the parks to go safra.. then dip dip.. then chomp chomp.. then walk walk again..
ok set... got my music to accompany me...and nice weather.. BEST ..!
(sometimes.. it feels great to be all alone once a while (kev's alone time always spent at sentosa on his off days while i at work )... but then.. being alone.. too much self talk and think too much, flashbacks of some good old happy sad bitter sweet sour tasteless.. memories.. .. some make me smile , some can make me cry.. , i like actually.. to have that a little time to be all by myself)
now i really don;t know what to do.. i thot that would be seeing him like right now..
but NO!!!! he'll be back at 11.
guess.. i eat alone, don;t have to open mouth today..no one to talk to..
self talk with blogger .. sianzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
but don;t think i can stay quiet very long with my lappy.........
hmmm... let's see.. maybe now i go get towel.. take a stroll through the parks to go safra.. then dip dip.. then chomp chomp.. then walk walk again..
ok set... got my music to accompany me...and nice weather.. BEST ..!
(sometimes.. it feels great to be all alone once a while (kev's alone time always spent at sentosa on his off days while i at work )... but then.. being alone.. too much self talk and think too much, flashbacks of some good old happy sad bitter sweet sour tasteless.. memories.. .. some make me smile , some can make me cry.. , i like actually.. to have that a little time to be all by myself)
arghhhh... i overslept!!!! not that i have anything to do or have i missed anything.. the whole afternoon almost gone.. and i do nothing, but sleep, which i actually need but don't want. my mind telling me go out .. do something, but my body wants to rest.. but my stomach complaining of hunger....
at safra this morning, when i registered the 12km fun run for kevin, the recept lady asked whyi looking so sad and tired..
sad..? yeah.. there are so many reason why i was and still feeling sad about..
tired.. ? cos i walked around looking for provision shop selling towels!!!
told her that i want towel.. !!! she said go to provision shop outside the club.. cheap cheap one.. i said to her i already did that .. but shops not open yet.. i was hoping that she could spare me one towel.. compliments from the club.. from their gym or got sell... some thing like that.. as long as i can go play water!!!
now waiting for kevin to come home.. yeah!!!
hungry..
at safra this morning, when i registered the 12km fun run for kevin, the recept lady asked whyi looking so sad and tired..
sad..? yeah.. there are so many reason why i was and still feeling sad about..
tired.. ? cos i walked around looking for provision shop selling towels!!!
told her that i want towel.. !!! she said go to provision shop outside the club.. cheap cheap one.. i said to her i already did that .. but shops not open yet.. i was hoping that she could spare me one towel.. compliments from the club.. from their gym or got sell... some thing like that.. as long as i can go play water!!!
now waiting for kevin to come home.. yeah!!!
hungry..
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